Tag: terminal illnesses

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Character Building

And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.  (Romans 5:3-5, NASB)
It seems the Bible is full of contradictory ideas. For example:  In my weakness, I am strong; I’m not free until I’m a slave to Christ; and the eternal King, Who rules His subjects with love.  Now comes another strange idea:  That I should rejoice in my trials and tribulations!

One author suggests that ALS is a process of saying “goodbye.”  I’ve found this to be true. So far, I’ve said “goodbye,” to running; to golf (the overall golfing community has not looked back!); to driving; to making coffee in the morning and taking it to Sue; to going up and down stairs; to walking; to feeding myself; to eating and drinking altogether;  and to scratching (!).  Through all this, the apostle Paul says I’m to exult!

But Paul says our trials lead to perseverance; which begets proven character; which results in hope.  And, says Paul, hope doesn’t disappoint because of God’s love for us!  This sounds like character building to me, and my thinking is there must be an easier way to go about it!  But God is in control (praise His holy Name!), this is His plan for me, and I trust that it’s better than mine!  What I like most about this passage is that the end product is hope!

Someone once said that adversity doesn’t build character, but rather  reveals it. This is something I think about as I try to finish the race, and finish well.

Worship:   Reason, by Unspoken 

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You’re terminal. Now what?

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And He said to him, “ ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.”  (Matthew 22: 36-40, NASB)

In this passage, Jesus is confronted by a Pharisaic lawyer who is trying to trap Him. Jesus answers his question on the great commandment by paraphrasing the great Jewish prayer, The Shema. The message is simple: Love God with everything you’ve got. Jesus adds the second commandment, love other people. If we can concentrate on those two things, everything else will fall into place!

After my diagnosis of ALS, after the shock had worn off, and I had come to my senses, I prayed and asked God to give me some direction. What would He want me to do with ALS? After all, I was headed to the unknown. I was already unable to walk, and over time I was sure to become less able, to the point of total dependency. How would someone in my state be able to carry out God’s commands?

Over the next days and weeks, the answer started to be clear. During Bible study, I prayed and tried to pay attention to God’s commands to see which ones I could do, and which ones would be impossible. It was as if God was saying, “I want you to do the same things I wanted you to do before. Nothing has changed.” There seemed to be nothing in the Bible that ALS would prevent me from doing. The only limitations I would have would be the same as before: My humanity and my sin nature.

For example, Jesus says I’m to love God and love people. I can still try to do those, ALS or not. And over time I’ve found it best to concentrate on what I CAN do versus what I can’t do.

On loving God: I can still study His Word to learn more about His laws and His goodness. I can still talk with Him.

On loving people: I still interact with people. My mission field is different: Hospitals, doctor’s offices, plus I have doctors, nurses, and therapists coming to me. I can’t speak, but I can still show God’s love to them. And I can still pray!

Love has a name: His name is Jesus!

Worship:  Love the Lord, by Lincoln Brewster 

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Just when I thought this day couldn’t get any worse. . .

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.  (Romans 15:13, NASB)

“You have ALS.” The neurologist’s words were direct and almost matter-of-fact. It was a sucker punch to the gut. A bucket of ice water dumped over my head. A neurologist at the VA said, “She dumped a load of bricks in your lap.”  I was in shock. My wife Sue, seated on a couch behind my transport chair, must have been as well. She was out of my view, but the doctor looked at her, then passed a box of tissues past me to her.

Until then, we thought the neurological condition I had was treatable and curable. But in that moment I received a death sentence. Had I been on death row I’d be considered a “dead man walking.” But I was no longer walking and I had taken my last steps some time ago. I considered myself a Dead Man Not Walking.

A million (well, a thousand) thoughts went through my mind in the next few minutes and into the night. How much longer do I have? How will I die? What will happen between now and then? What about my plans? What hope is there?

 Sue and I had plans: Traveling to see our kids; a cruise to Alaska; lots of golf together and with friends after retirement in a couple more years (OK, I’m a lousy golfer, so maybe it’s best that one went away). Old Yiddish proverb: We plan, and God laughs. I realized soon that despite my best plans, God would override them. I would have to trust that no matter what would happen to me, His plan is far better for me.

Since my diagnosis a little over three years ago, I’ve lost total use of my limbs; I’ve had a tracheostomy and am now 100% reliant on a ventilator to breathe; and I’m no longer able to safely eat or drink for fear of aspirating the food and drink into my lungs. I’ve gone from a fully functional human being (some will question that) to one not capable of any physical action. Is there hope? If so, how and why?

I have to tell you that my hope is in the Lord. I’m a sinner saved by the grace of God though the blood of His Son Jesus Christ. Because of His mercy toward me, I have the hope of eternal life, a home in heaven in the presence of the Lord. I have hope in healing because of the resurrection power of Jesus Christ. If you, like me, have ALS, some other terminal disease, or you’re in some other situation that seems hopeless, you too can find hope by placing your faith and trust in Jesus Christ! Accept God’s most precious gift: His Son.  A line from the old hymn: “My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.”

Hope has a name: His name is Jesus.

Worship: My Hope, Hillsong Worship, featuring Darlene Zschech